Overcoming Resentment

I can’t think of a year wrought with more challenges than 2020. I certainly wouldn’t blame anyone for being resentful over the missed milestones including graduations, proms, or for having to delay major life events including weddings or even big trips that were planned. Here’s the thing, though, resentment is poisonous.

Listen in as I reflect on my own struggles with resentment and how I’ve addressed them. If you also struggle with that emotion, here are four tips for overcoming it:

1. Challenge yourself to focus on the positive things in your life and not the negatives. Don’t go around looking for things to be upset by. Playing the victim is tiring not only for you but for others around you as well. Try to see the world for its beauty, not its scars.
2. Focus on your own self-esteem. I believe there is an inverse relationship between resentment and self-esteem. When my own self-esteem was low, my resentment towards others was high. Some ways to address your own self esteem include finding things you are good at and doing them often,  exercising regularly, and spending time with people who make you happy.
3. If you have had some experiences that you can point to that negatively impacted your life, particularly those in childhood, I urge you to seek a professional who can help you work through them. At the very least, open up to a trusted friend about them. There’s no shame in vulnerability and you will feel better after talking to someone about it.
4. If you have an issue with resentment towards a person, try to see them through a different lens. If they are a family member, try to see them as a fellow human being. By doing so, you might be able to be a bit more understanding towards them and your relationship may improve.

As always, thank you for listening to Uncorking a Story. Happy new year and see you in 2020.

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