Freedom through Surrender, with Brian O'Hare

I believe that, no matter how old we are, we never stop trying to secure the approval of one or both of our parents. While my twin brother was always searching for our father’s affections, I was always trying to vie for my mother’s approval in everything I did. Today’s guest, Brian O’Hare can relate. Imagine having a larger than life character as a father—someone who casts so wide a shadow, you might lose yourself in it. Well, that’s where Brian’s story begins!

Meet Brian O’Hare:

Brian is a graduate of the US Naval Academy and former US Marine Corps officer. His storytelling career began in a Baltimore bar, the legendary Club Charles, where director John Waters cast him to appear in his film Cry Baby. Currently, Brian an award-winning writer and filmmaker living in Los Angeles. His work has appeared in War, Literature and the Arts; Santa Fe Writers Project; Hobart; and other journals, and he has been nominated for two Pushcart Prizes. He was named a Writing Fellow at the Virginia Center for the Creative Arts and recently served as Visiting Writer at CUNY/Kingsborough. He joined me on Uncorking a Story to discuss his career and new book, Surrender.

Feeling as if we have to constantly search for the approval of a parent. The danger of denying parts of self to appease another person. How writing Surrender was Brian’s way of breaking the cycle of constantly searching for approval in his life for his own benefit and for the benefit of his children. Why, in Brian’s case, the notion of surrender ironically equates to freedom.